Recently on twitter, a black man posted tweets referring to all black women as difficult and demanding, verses the white women that he dates.
I'm sure you can imagine how many feathers he rustled by making these comments, but it made me stop to look at my past experiences in dating. Had I ever been called difficult by a partner? Yes. But I only attribute it to certain instances and for specific reasons.
Life experiences have definitely showed me that the color of my skin, my gender, and even the depth of my knowledge, can limit my opportunities in America. Discrimination, sexual harassment, disrespect, physical and verbal abuse, and retaliation, make up my experiences with certain people and certain employers. However, my wake up call of how the "real world" is -- was through my many places of employment.
Getting my first job at the age of 13 years old, I wasn't prepared for the differences in personalities outside of my family and close friends.
I knew people were different but I always assumed everyone shared the same common core values of niceness, fairness, manners, and respect for others. One thing that I learned, is to never expect anyone to be nice to you just because you're nice to them.
Negative experiences in my life often left me with a tiny chip on my shoulder, but the good experiences seemed to outweigh the bad (or that's how I chose to view it), but both opposites taught me meaningful lessons and truly opened my eyes to what the real world looked like.
Absolutely, it was difficult to deal with hurt and pain that formed from the negative moments -- but I chose to view them just as that; a bunch of bad moments that occurred every now and again. If certain periods of time didn't happen I wouldn't be who I am today.
I'd rather be aware of worldly things because to not be, only means hindering your life long learning process. The more aware you are, the more you have a better view of where you're going.
Certain lessons learned may have made me sharper, wiser, aware, aggressive, and yes at times "difficult", but it comes from a place of pain. The pain of the struggles endured to get to where I am today, makes me damned determined to keep fighting for it! Fighting isn't easy but since I'm not a quitter, fighting seems to be the only option.
Life experiences have definitely showed me that the color of my skin, my gender, and even the depth of my knowledge, can limit my opportunities in America. Discrimination, sexual harassment, disrespect, physical and verbal abuse, and retaliation, make up my experiences with certain people and certain employers. However, my wake up call of how the "real world" is -- was through my many places of employment.
Getting my first job at the age of 13 years old, I wasn't prepared for the differences in personalities outside of my family and close friends.
I knew people were different but I always assumed everyone shared the same common core values of niceness, fairness, manners, and respect for others. One thing that I learned, is to never expect anyone to be nice to you just because you're nice to them.
Negative experiences in my life often left me with a tiny chip on my shoulder, but the good experiences seemed to outweigh the bad (or that's how I chose to view it), but both opposites taught me meaningful lessons and truly opened my eyes to what the real world looked like.
Absolutely, it was difficult to deal with hurt and pain that formed from the negative moments -- but I chose to view them just as that; a bunch of bad moments that occurred every now and again. If certain periods of time didn't happen I wouldn't be who I am today.
I'd rather be aware of worldly things because to not be, only means hindering your life long learning process. The more aware you are, the more you have a better view of where you're going.
Certain lessons learned may have made me sharper, wiser, aware, aggressive, and yes at times "difficult", but it comes from a place of pain. The pain of the struggles endured to get to where I am today, makes me damned determined to keep fighting for it! Fighting isn't easy but since I'm not a quitter, fighting seems to be the only option.
So to the guy on twitter generalizing all black women as "difficult" and "demanding", just remember that our stories are different. We come from all walks of life, are actually a mixture of races (if you want to get technical), and probably have more in common then we have differences.
Try to understand a sista before placing judgement and usually, communication is all it takes.
Communicate witcha girls bruh!
Try to understand a sista before placing judgement and usually, communication is all it takes.
Communicate witcha girls bruh!
The Things That Make You Go Hmmmmm...
2013 LA
